Category: Popular Posts

The Power and Failings of Leadership: The Caine Mutiny

Leadership is a trait that can start from any place in an organization but usually starts at the top and runs throughout the entire organization. Great leaders create great organizations through picking and developing winning teams. Bad leaders can create failure in any organization.

“The Caine Mutiny” is a novel about a commanding officer, Lieutenant Commander Philip Francis Queeg, whose endless mistakes and tyrannical command create such desperation among the officers that they commit mutiny. Herman Wouk, the author of the “The Caine Mutiny,” drew upon his knowledge from World War II experiences aboard a similar vessel, the USS Zane.

The book dramatically portrays leadership failure. The mistakes, tyranny, and dishonesty of Captain Queeg result in mistakes among the officers and crew and create dangerous and embarrassing situations for the ship under his command, the USS Caine.

As I said in an earlier post, there is a saying in the United States Navy, “So Goes the Captain, So Goes the Wardroom, So Goes the Ship.”  The wardroom is the officers’ eating area aboard ship. The point of this statement is simple. Great commanding officers raise the performance of their officers and in turn their crew.

Great leaders have left great quotes to instruct us on leadership. During World War II, Fleet Admiral Chester William Nimitz was the Commander-in-Chief, United States Pacific Fleet (CinCPac) and Commander-in-Chief, Pacific Ocean Areas (CinCPOA), for U.S. and Allied air, land, and sea forces. Here are two quotes from Nimitz that show his view of leadership.

“Leadership consists of picking good men and helping them do their best.”

“Some of the best advice I’ve had comes from junior officers and enlisted men.”

The greatest leader I ever knew is Admiral Sylvester R. Foley, who was also the Commander in Chief, United States Pacific Fleet, and my captain aboard the aircraft carrier the USS Midway. He would say things to encourage and to simplify the job for the people under his command. Great leaders like Nimitz and Foley influence lives. The leadership I experienced under Admiral Foley gives me confidence and direction to this day.

Photo by Ivan Bandura on Unsplash

 

The Liberating Power of Forgiving Someone

Sometimes the greatest freedom comes from forgiving someone. ~ Jay Wren

When I hold onto grudges, I essentially allow the past to control my peace of mind. Reliving anger leads to anxiety, depression, and strained relationships. Forgiveness, on the other hand, is a conscious decision I make to release the clutter of negative emotions and enjoy the mental clarity of the good things all around me.

To me, forgiveness does not mean forgetting or minimizing the harm someone may have caused me. It is not about excusing the offender’s actions. Rather, it is about choosing to let go of the anger free myself from the pain of the past. It’s about breaking free from the chains of bitterness and reclaiming your inner peace.

Forgiving others is not just about benefiting them; it’s primarily about benefiting myself. It allows me to move on from the past and embrace a more positive future. It opens the door to compassion, empathy, and healthier relationships.

Forgiveness is not always easy. It may take time, and it may require seeking support from a friend or mentor. For some people, it may require help from a therapist or counselor. But the rewards of forgiveness are immense. It can lead to greater emotional Ill-being, improved relationships, and a more fulfilling life.

Ultimately, forgiveness is a choice. It is a choice to prioritize my own healing and Ill-being over the pain of the past. It is a choice to break free from the chains of bitterness and embrace a life filled with compassion and joy.

I can’t always just stop struggling to let go of anger. Mentally reliving a bad experience sometimes can even feel reward. I think, “Oh, here’s what I should have said or done.” But those little moments of satisfaction I may enjoy from those thoughts rob me of the real joy of living in the present moment. Also, I have to remind myself that forgiving takes time. But I remind myself that forgiveness is not about condoning the past but about choosing a better future for myself.

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Pause

When I feel frustrated, in doubt, or angry, stepping away from a situation gives me the opportunity to calm my emotions. The separation allows me to reduce the noise in my head. I think more clearly. I make better decisions. I can try to reduce tension between another person and me by saying things like this:

“May I get back to you?”
“If I were in your shoes, I might feel the same way.”
“I understand.”

But first, I must pause.

Photo by Isham Fernandez on Unsplash

They Have a Purpose

Have a purpose for the things you plan to do. Ask yourself questions like these: What do you want to accomplish? Who will benefit from your purpose? Will the purpose reward you for your time, effort, and money? Will your purpose lead you to even greater opportunities?

Photo by Guille Álvarez on Unsplash

Attitudes

Stick with winners. Surround yourself with people who will make you smarter, healthier, happier, and more successful. Spend time with supportive people. Good company does more than make life fun. People who encourage you build your confidence. Furthermore, these people can help you find solutions and succeed in tough times.

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Peace

In a material world, it is easy to think that peace of mind comes from getting the things we want. However, getting what we want often only leads to wanting more things. Even more painful, there is the anxiety of losing the things that we wanted so badly. So, what do we need to have to find peace of mind? We must find freedom from want, freedom from fear, and freedom from anxiety.

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No Excuses

Authenticity and self-honesty are critical to success. You can’t solve a problem until you admit that that you have a problem. However much it may hurt, the first step to bouncing back from a mistake is to be honest, with absolutely no excuses, that you made a mistake

Photo by Antoine Rault on Unsplash

Hurt Feelings

In sports, athletes and coaches decide whether an athlete should continue to play or stop and receive medical attention. Is the athlete hurt or injured.

A common phrase in sports is “Rub some dirt on it.” Athletes just take their mind off the little pains in sports and get physically and mentally back into the game.

Hurt feelings in the workplace can be like be pains in sports. Somebody may say something or behave in a way that hurts or feelings. The best response is to pause. Are we hurt or are we injured?

If we get angry and raise the issue to a higher level by saying or doing something to hurt the person’s feelings in return, we can make matters worse. The best response is to pause. We can put the issue out of our mind until our anger has passed. We can speak with someone to get advice. We can “rub some dirt on it” and continue to focus on our jobs for the day.

In sports and in relationships, no response or silence is the best response.

For hiring managers, the chemistry of the job interview influences hiring decisions as the much as the skills of the job applicant.

For hiring managers, the chemistry of the job interview influences hiring decisions as the much as the skills of the job applicant. Think about it. The interviewer has read your resume.  Before the applicant arrives, the hiring manager has seen the applicants qualifications.

Interview Tips: the Chemistry of the Job Interview

Setbacks and Resilience

Successful people have setbacks. Everyone does. But successful people bounce back. They have resilience.
~ www.jaywren.com

How is it that some people can overcome setbacks while other people can’t?  Are there skills for resilience that everyone can learn?

Five Obstacles to Resilience

  • Fear
  • Pride
  • Confusion
  • Procrastination
  • Resentments

Here are ways to overcome those five obstacles.

Fear

When we have setbacks in threatening circumstances, it is natural to experience fear.

Fear can shut us down mentally and block our willingness to bounce back.

Dealing with fear starts with an understanding that fear is in our head.  We scare ourselves with the way we think.

If you are continually struggling with fear, find knowledgeable, positive mentors who can help you make great decisions and build your confidence to act on your setbacks.

Pride

Pride is a healthy view of our accomplishments.  We find satisfaction in our achievements and the people with whom we associate.  Pride gives people confidence.

Other the other hand, when pride covers our insecurities, it prevents us seeing our role in our problems.

To recover, we don’t have to swallow our pride.  We don’t have to be ashamed or embarrassed for our mistakes.  We just need to recognize our role in our setbacks and work to correct those mistakes.

Confusion

To recover from setbacks, we need to understand what has happened to us and what we need to do to bounce back.

Confusion is especially common when the things we were doing have stopped working.  Try as we may to use old skills, they fail us.  We can’t bounce back until we recognize the problem and develop new skills and resources to become resilient.

Procrastination

Ugh.  Procrastination is an annoying reluctance to do the things that will correct our problems.

The way to overcome procrastination is to break the process to recovery into small, individual steps. Just do at least one small thing. Doing one small thing has two potentially positive effects on recovery. A single step each day adds up as we work toward solving our problems. Furthermore, doing just one step often leads to doing all the steps to correct a problem and put the work behind us.

Resentments

Resilience is not about getting even with people who have harmed us.  It’s about getting ourselves back on track.

Holding resentments or grudges hold us back from moving on with our lives.  They are obstacles to resilience.

Grudges are simply a way to feel superior to people who have harmed us.  We ruminate on how we can set them straight.  Furthermore, resentments can become destructive obsessions.

The stress of a grudge not only blocks us mentally, it damages us physically.  The loss of energy from holding grudges makes it harder from us to work on solutions.  Long-term stress from grudges creates mental and emotional problems.

Letting go of grudges and focusing on rebuilding relationships is a powerful way to bounce back from setbacks. These relationships increase our effectiveness and empower us with people who support us.

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